"Hellooooooo. Kreatrix? Are you in there?"

Ginger and I are reporting to you from the Kreatrix' giant cat bed. We're staring at her right now but her eyes are closed.

I almost don't recognize her from this angle. She's usually standing and VERY tall. She appears to be resting comfortably with some assistance from a cool little bottle next to her cat bed.

This morning she was taking down the weird tree thing you humans put in your houses this time of year and then she screams this:

"AHHHHH! OH CREATOR OF THE UNIVERSE! OH COW DUNG! OH STEAMING PILE OF HORSE POOH. OH, OH..."

I don't know the meaning of the word she said next or I would have put in a suitable family-friendly substitute for it too. Of course, I immediately thought of this:

Yup. The curse jar. But I'm assuming this would not be a good idea at this particular moment. The pain is still too fresh. All in good time.

Anywho, she grabbed her back and limped to the bedroom where she has remained.

I'm trying to understand why you humans would ever want to throw out something as useful as the human back. Is there a special bin you put it in for recycling?

Now, instead of working with her on my car or world domination or my cool vintage imac thing, I must stay here and try to figure out how to get her back out of the garbage can.

I'm gonna wake her.

"HiYA! HOW'S YOUS DOIN' THERE KIDDO?"

But soft! She stirs!!

"Come closer little Chairman. I think the medicine has kicked in.

I lean in. She whispers

"I'll share a  trick with you from my home planet."

She holds my paws to her head and WE DO A FREAKING MIND MELD!

Wow!!

Is this really how I look? I asked the Prof (her male human). All he did was pick up the little bottle and shake it at me.

Humans. Now I'm off to go fish her back out of the garbage and google how to reattach it.